Memories Of Esther Uzoma

‘ *Only remembered by what we have done!’ A TRIBUTE TO ESTHER UZOMA * by Okechukwu Nwanguma, Executive Director, RULAAC. The caption for this tribute to Esther Uzoma is taken from the Hymn entitled ‘Fading away like the stars of the morning’. And the chorus after each stanza starts with ‘only remembered…by what we have done’. And so, like the stars of the morning, Esther faded away on Wednesday, January 6, 2021. This ‘fading away’ was sudden. Neither Esther nor anyone close to her could have had the premonition that Esther would be gone so soon. It was shocking, as it was not expected to happen so soon and so tragically. It was painful because Esther’s passing was untimely. We have every reason to grieve because Esther could have still lived. We loved Esther and she meant so much to many of us. Esther was energetic, passionate, sociable, playful, humorous and expressive. She was passionate and serious minded about what she believed in. She was a great soul and came across to many as a kindred spirit. Her commitment to the cause of women’s rights, gender equality and to democratic reforms were doubtless and inspiring. As a gender equality advocate, she was knowledgeable and therefore, reasonable and avoided the dogmatism, fanaticism and cantankerous disposition of a few who mistake gender equality as entailing women being at daggers drawn with men, some of whom have been known to be more trenchant advocates of gender equality. By her death, the rank of activists genuinely committed to good governance has further depleted. We grieve because we didn’t expect that we would lose Esther so soon, and so suddenly. But her passing also brings home some lessons for those of us lucky to be still breathing. It also offers us the opportunity for self-examination and reflection. How have we been living our lives? How have our relationships with people been? How do we treat people that we come in contact with and what do they think about us? What impact are we making on people’s lives and on society generally? Shall we be missed by the people whose paths crossed with ours, when we are gone? What shall they remember us for? What memories would we leave them with: sad memories or fond memories? Today, Esther is mourned and missed by many who encountered her. There is an outpouring of grief and good testimonies about her life and works. This is not because she was perfect. Nobody can be perfect. But because she strove and made deliberate endeavours to be kind, nice and fair to people she met. She was good at what she set out to do. Can the same be said of us when we are gone? The first time I met Esther, she was immediately friendly and jolly and related as though we had known for years. She hailed me ‘Okey my brother! The civilian IGP’ and engaged me in a spirited discussion bothering on my engagement with the Police and other governance issues. She was full of energy, and of kind and encouraging words. She exuded love. Her passion, mixed with her -sometimes, scandalizing sense of humour- even while addressing serious matters stood her out. She always lightened up her environment and this endeared her to many. She was everybody’s darling often hailed as ‘Allied Matters” in reference to her oft expressed belief that its healthy to unwind after the day’s hard work. And she was responsible about this. And unwinding together actually facilitated bonding among colleagues and peers. I remember that she invited members of the Civil Society Situation room out for drink in the evening of the day she was unanimously elected as the new Convener of the situation room after Mr. Clement Nwankwo. That was Esther’s spirit. Convivial and gregarious, yet firm, principled and responsible. Esther was popular in the legal and civil society circles in Nigeria. Her unanimous and unopposed election as the Chairperson of the Steering Committee of the Situation Room after Mr. Nwankwo was a testament to her popularity. It was reward for commitment, loyalty and hard work. Esther was without cant or hubris. She was respectful, large- hearted and accommodating. The outpouring of grief over her demise by many who knew her is demonstrative of her popularity and the high esteem in which she was held by many people. The worse thing that can happen to anyone is to die unsung, and with negative memories and legacy. Esther has been hailed and mourned like a heroine because she stood for something. Even in death she stood tall and towered high above what many could imagine. For her passion for the struggle to build a stable and democratic society that works for all; and for her devotion to advocating for gender equality and good governance, history will sure be kind to Esther. She has etched her name on the positive side of history. Esther will live in our hearts and evergreen in our memory because we’ll always remember her for her good work. All we owe her is to keep hope alive, to continue to advance our common cause and the struggles to which she committed her life and made immense contributions. If by her death, we are reminded to live – mindful of what we shall be remembered for, mindful of what legacies we want to leave behind; if by her death, we are called upon to examine our lives and to rededicate ourselves to the ideals we shared with Esther, then, her death, sudden, shocking, tragic, untimely and painful though it is, could not have been in vain. This is the only way to give life to the dead and hope to the living. Rest on in power, Esther! Rest on ‘Allied Matters’. May God comfort and shield your family! …………………………………………………………………………………………………….. Fading away like the stars of the morning, Losing their light in the glorious sun- Thus would we pass from the earth and its toiling, Only remembered by what we have done. Chorus Only remembered, only remembered, Only remembered by what we have done; Thus would we pass from the earth and its toiling, Only remembered by what we have done. 2. Shall we be missed though by others succeeded, Raping the fields we in springtime have sown? No, for the sowers may pass from their labors, Only remembered by what they have done. 3. Only the truth that in life we have spoken, Only the seed that on earth we have sown; These shall pass onward when we are forgotten, Fruits of the harvest and what we have done.